Good Sex comes from Good Communication
What do you think is the number one indicator for a fulfilling sex life?
The right techniques, a sexy body,
The just right person?
Actually, it’s none of the these,
Believe it or not, good sex comes from good communication,
And talking about sex can feel very awkward mostly because
Of the childhood messages such as:
-Sex is sinful
-Men are more interested in sex than women
-Talking about sex is dirty.
These messages define what’s considered to be acceptable and “normal”
in our society.
So, when a person’s sexuality is outside of the “norm,”,
Which most of us ARE,
shame, guilt, and fear show up in the relationship, with thoughts such as these:
I could never ask for that—I’d die of embarrassment.
If thoughts like this come up for you when thinking about having a conversation with your lover about sex, you’re no alone. A first step may be to do some self reflection and ask yourself what do you want in your sexual life.
A baby step could be to ask your partner if they are willing to have a conversation about your sexual life. First start with what is you love about your sex life and one thing you would like more of. Each person gets a chance to talk while the other one listens. Then the next person gets to go.
Start with the positive and build on what is working in order for the subject of talking about sex comfortable in the relationship.